Since it's September again, my baptism month, I thought I'd copy something from my journal of last December that expresses a little bit about my feelings of gratitude. It was our fiftieth anniversary, and in my mind I was remembering and thinking of the joys and challenges, miracles and blessings over the years. When we got married, we were both young and immature and we were very unprepared for marriage and parenthood and adulthood. Of course I was happy, and my heart was in the right place, but I was extremely naive and inexperienced.
Here's a small part of what I wrote in my journal on December 21, 2018:
"How thankful I am for the gospel plan and teachings! The faith and understanding I was able to develop as time went by, anchored and rescued me. The messages from the prophets in Conference and elsewhere, wonderful Improvement Era and Ensign articles and others, Know-Your-Religion talks, Education Week lectures, Relief Society lessons, messages in hymns, great examples from wise and spiritual women and teachers, as well as personal answers to prayers, and much help and comfort from above - all helped me gain a bit of perspective, understanding, wisdom and experience that nobody helped me with as I was growing up. Mom and us kids [sic] were quite an isolated little unit. Her parents were dead, and Dad's parents had contact with Dad, but practically none with us.
Back to what I learned through the gospel teachings - it's mainly about P r i o r i t i e s. I'm so grateful that the church and gospel taught me to place my priorities in the right place - family and faith, basically. So thankful for that. The babies were my greatest joy and treasure on earth. So thankful I made them and the marriage my first priority [and for many years, about my only focus], along w/ church and family service. And I tried to make our happy, creative home 'a house of fasting, a place of prayer, a house of order' etc."
.... "But again, the gospel teachings and Spirit rescued us. How often I used to pray for Heavenly Father to show or tell John something I wanted him to know or understand (in our early married years), and it was almost uncanny how quickly it worked. Because back then he (sometimes) didn't really listen when I tried to tell him something." - End of journal entry.
PS I remember well how I would sometimes pray that the Lord would tell him, and then within days he would say something like, 'you know, I have the feeling that we could/should do this or this.' It's easy to imagine how comforted and secure it made me feel to know the Lord was aware of us and helping us, and also that John was prayerful and obedient to the promptings he was receiving, and trying to do his best.
